I would like to make one thing perfectly clear. I must rely on my humans to relate my story to you, exactly as I dictate it to them. I take absolutely no credit for any artistic talent or lack therof, they may wish to display with their choice of graphics. Now, that you have read this disclaimer, I will continue on with my life experiences, that I hope you will enjoy. I must warn you however, some parts are quite difficult for me to share.

I really can't recall much of my life as a newborn. I know I had brothers and sisters. I never knew my father. I guess he didn't want a family. The humans who were taking care of my mother and us were nice enough people but they were college students who were not able to keep us all.

I remember one day, we were put in a box, had a ride in a car and were brought to a shopping mall. All kinds of people picked us up, cuddled us and said how cute we were but nobody wanted us. (sniff)

After a long afternoon in the hot sun, a pretty blonde lady picked me up,(her words, not mine) held me close to her face and I gently placed my paw on her cheek and looked into her eyes, I knew then, that she was the type of person who would love me. She looked at me and said "Karma". I knew I had found a home! I never saw my mother or brothers and sisters again. (sniff)

What I did not know at the time, was that the male human my female human was married to, didn't have much use for cats. He was in the store at the time and had no idea what the female had just done. Well, I have to tell you, that was a touch & go type ride to my new home. Fortunately, he must love her because I heard him say "if she makes you happy, I'll adjust". I knew that I would have to really work hard to butter him up to have him love me too. I hate to get ahead of the story here but I simply can't wait! my plan worked! He calls me "his cat", he loves me!

I have a little secret to tell you that I know he would really be embarrased about if he knew I told, so, please keep this between you & me. Every morning, after he gets his coffee, he stretches out on the sofa to plan his day. Now, here's the secret, shhh, I get upon his chest and suckle and knead on his neck - and he lets me! Purrrrrrrrr. (remember, no telling now). Mommy doesn't even know.

Well, getting back to the story, we arrived at my new home to be greeted (if that is not an understatement, I'll eat my tail) by this huge white ferocious looking beast called "Lady"! She was a DOG! They didn't warn me about her. The first few days were sort of touch & go but I soon prevailed and we got along fairly well. We even curl up together from time to time. Of course that is when nobody is looking. She's not so ferocius after all. In fact, she's an old softie. She even tries to bathe me - YUK!

This background is a view of the mountains where I live in upstate New York with my two humans & Lady. Now,how's that for a backyard? The only problem is, they won't let me outside to explore it. They worry too much about me. I promised them that I would not stray too far from home. There's just so much to explore and I want to see it all. They seem to think that since I no longer have front claws, I couldn't possibly defend myself but I know I could. They also had me "fixed" (as if I were broken).That is one decision I really do have to agree with. I know that I'm the exception here because I was fortunate enough to find a loving home. It still makes me so angry that so many will suffer and die because humans just refuse to do "the right thing". If you really do love your pets, please do the right thing and have them neutered!

I did actually manage to escape once. My humans were on vacation in Cancun and left me in the care of my "Uncle Charlie" (that's their son) He was very good to me but his child, Kayla, tried to flush me down the toilet. After that experience, I darted out the door the first chance I got. It was frightening. I spent the whole night in a tree. That was three years ago and I still have not lost my fear of little people. Fortunately, I am now too big to be flushed!

At this point I suppose I should tell you their names. When they are on the web, they like to be known as "Deep Diver" and Dolphin's Dream. I know them as Mommy and Daddy. I really can't figure out why they use those silly names. Maybe they don't want anyone to know who they really are, which is, in my humble opinion quite "human" They honestly are really "neat" people. People who know them, like them, so why hide? (Humans - go figure!)

Well they did it again! They took off for sunny Florida and left me in the care of two humans who really don't know my likes & dislikes at all! Would you believe my litter box was only changed once? Boy are daddy & mommy going to get a meow full when they get home! (I'm glad they had to live through that hurricane Irene! That's what they get for deserting me!

(Two Weeks Later)

Whew! they're home! I am so angry that they left me and I want to be my usual aloof self but I am so happy to see them that I just want to snuggle close to and feel warm carresses (I love them, after all,they're MY humans) please don't tell them I said that! I'll deny it!

When I woke up this morning Lady Dog was really not her usual self. She wouldn't eat and had a really hard time even getting up to go outside. Mommy & Daddy seemed really upset about it. I heard them talking about how really old she is but I don't understand what that has to do with anything.
Mommy's been on the phone with a doctor for Lady Dog. She told Daddy the doctor wanted to see her. Daddy is taking her alone because Mommy is too upset to go.

A few hours later, Daddy came home alone! He was crying! He didn't say anything to Mommy but she started crying too. I have the worst feeling that none of us will ever see Lady Dog again! I wish I knew how to cry but I don't! I just know I will miss her too. If she ever comes home, I promise I'll let her give me a bath.

Wow! this looks like a cat's heaven! My humans put up a tree in the living room! (foolish move on their part) The lights and tinsel look mighty tempting to me) I promise I will try to control myself! After all there probably will be something under there for me.

Well, I was right! There were lots of pretty packages for me! I got lots and lots of toys. My very favorite one is a red and blue ball with a bell inside. The only problem is, I like to play with it after all the lights are off and everyone has gone to bed. They just can't seem to understand this is the perfect time to play! You know, they actually hide it on me? If that's how they feel, why give it to me in the first place? Must be that "human thing" again!

Time seems to fly! I find it hard to believe the winter and spring have gone by so quickly. Mommy & Daddy still talk about Lady Dog at times but now instead of crying, I hear them laughing.I guess that's a good thing. They seem to have so much more time for me lately. It's almost as if they need me more now than before Lady Dog left. I don't understand it but I'm grateful for all the extra attention.

Oh no! Here we go again! I see suitcases out again and Mommy & Daddy are rummaging through all of their clothes. That can mean only one thing - they are leaving me again! Now, I wonder, just who do they have in mind to take care of me this time?

I think I've come up with a plan! Right now,the suitcases are on the floor with all the clothes in them but still open. I'll just wait until they're not looking and hide under the pile. (brilliant idea if I do say so myself) I'm simply purring at the thought of how surprised they'll be when the get to their destination. Just think - they'll open the cases & voila! there I'll be! I just know they'll love it, don't you?

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